Last night, Charlie came by again and I went to see him. His opening act, Colt Ford, is somebody I had never heard of. I may not listen to country, but since I live in Kentucky, I can't help but be aware of who the popular artists are. I saw hordes of girls wearing Colt Ford T-shirts, which led me to assume he was young and/or attractive. When Colt stepped onstage, I immediately saw I was wrong on both counts. He was very overweight with long hair and a beard that could earn him a guest appearance on Duck Dynasty.
I almost laughed hysterically when he started singing about cruising around getting girls to ride in his pickup because women were rushing the stage to get selfies with him. I guarantee that if they were approached by a man who looked like Colt but wasn't rich and famous and wanted to take them for a ride, they would run screaming in the opposite direction. They might even call the cops.
Lots of tiresome lyrics about huntin' fishin' and muddin'. I also learned that Colt is responsible for one of the most overplayed, terrible songs of the last few years "Dirt Road Anthem." I may not like country, but I still think he has a lot of nerve comparing himself to George Jones. In a different song, Colt compared his feelings for a woman to his love of chicken 'n biscuits, both of which he should probably cut out of his diet if he wants to live a few more years. "I love you like a fat kid loves cake" was not a complimentary sentiment when 50 Cent sang it; making it about different food items and singing it with a Southern twang does not improve upon it. The only song I didn't absolutely hate during his set was his cover of "Lose Yourself" by Eminem.
When Charlie Daniels hit the stage, the crowd went even wilder, as well they should have; he's a living legend of country music. His set wasn't like what he played back in '03, which featured everything from Lynyrd Skynyrd covers to his own music. Last night's concert consisted mostly instrumental jamming, terrible solo projects his band members wrote, Dylan covers, a Johnny Cash cover, and a drum solo that went on entirely too long. Charlie did play a handful of his standards: "Long-Haired Country Boy," "The South's Gonna Do It Again," and my all-time favorite "The Legend of Wooley Swamp." The finale was the guaranteed crowd-pleaser "The Devil Went Down to Georgia." Even though Charlie is 78 years old and had a stroke a few years ago, the man can still play the hell out of a fiddle and a guitar.