2. Rod: (after the singer butchers the national anthem) That was borderline treasonous and a disgrace to our nation and its proud and storied history.
3. Doug: Where's LaFlamme?
Gord: Probably giving a single mother herpes in a parking lot.
4. Eva: You make me wanna stop sleeping with a bunch of guys.
Doug: That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
5. Gord: (while drunk) Do you know cats only meow when there are people around?
6. Ronnie: Tonight--good food, good women, good rest...not necessarily in that order.
7. (The team is trying to talk Doug into their supposed initiation ritual of getting his penis signed)
Oleg: It's not gay.
Evgeni: Not if you're brothers.
Marco: If you're brothers, it's gay with a fucking dash of somethin' else.
8. Doug: For once in my life, I'm actually a part of something. I get to wear a uniform that doesn't have "security" on it. Kids buy it and they wear it and it's got our name on it. Now for whatever reason, you guys think I'm smart enough to be a doctor or something. I have fist smarts. I can fight. I'm strong and I can protect people. That's who I am. That's what I do. And you should be proud of me.
9. Ronnie: Funny? As in "ha-ha" funny? Like flushing a $5 million contract up your nose funny? Or funny as in "peculiar," like Doug here?
10. Marco: Two rules: Don't touch my Percocets. And do you have any fucking Percocets?