Pats Nation: The Decision

I tend to overthink almost every decision I have to make, including trivial ones like which sports teams I'll follow. Granted, not all "my" teams; I found the Braves at the tender age of 9 and never looked back. Both my parents are diehard New Jersey Devils fans, so I never had much of a choice when it came to hockey. I'm still a proud member of the Devils Army, though, with a framed picture of Marty Brodeur on my bedroom wall to prove it.

Pro football is another story altogether. 5 days ago, I was left wondering yet again where to place my loyalties after a severe disappointment. I've thought long and hard about it and decided that I will be maintaining my citizenship in Pats Nation for the following reasons:

1. Family. I always say I'm Southern merely by accident of birth. My relatives are all from various places in the Northeast: Brooklyn, Massachusetts, upstate New York, and New Jersey. My favorite baseball team (Braves) and favorite college team (Gators) are from the Deep South, so this kind of balances things out.

2. Bill Belichick. I don't know why, but I've always had a thing about crotchety old coaches/managers. This is probably because the majority of my life as a Braves fan was during Bobby Cox's tenure as manger. He was just fun to watch; you never knew when he'd start ranting and raving at the umpires. He had a record-breaking number of ejections. Say what you will about Bobby; the man was passionate about his job and knew how to field a winning team. Although, personally, I think Bill should've taken a page out of Bobby's book and knocked down Brady's ego several pegs a long time ago.

3. Rob Gronkowski. No pun intended, but Gronk is my biggest reason for sticking around. I've always had a weakness for large, bearlike men and Gronk makes me swoon. I've watched and read several interviews with him and there's just something about his personality that I love; he reminds me of about 70% of my guy friends from college. Sure, he's made some questionable decisions this off-season, like riding roller coasters and slam-dancing while in a cast. But hey, at least he's not currently on trial for murder.

Watch the infamous "Yo soy fiesta" interview and tell me the big guy doesn't have a certain charm.

Party on, Gronk!

Pats Nation: To Defect or Not to Defect?

Early yesterday morning, I woke up to find my phone flooded with headlines courtesy of my SportsCenter app. One of these did not bear good news: Tim Tebow had been released at the very last minute by the Patriots. To quote a very dear friend of mine, seeing that "hurt my heart." Tebow gives himself wholly to every team he's a part of, only to have his dreams slip through his fingers (his playoff season with Denver being the exception). He's tweeted that he refuses to give up on being an NFL quarterback.

I deeply respect and admire him as a person, but I can't help but think that's not the best of ideas. For whatever reason, no team seems to want to touch him (even his hometown of Jacksonville...traitors). He has been screwed over time and time again. Tim still thinking there's a team that will appreciate what he has to offer rides that thin line between optimism and delusion. However, I tend to root for the underdogs, so I really hope someone picks him up.

I have to commend Tim for always looking on the bright side of things and continuing to try; I took his example to heart. If I had seen my lack of physical endurance as an insurmountable obstacle and given up exercise, I wouldn't have been the first-ever female on my college firefighter combat challenge team. (I didn't make the competition squad, but I packed on about 5-10 pounds of muscle that semester and almost never missed practice). And I most certainly wouldn't be just over a month and a half into my probationary period as a volunteer firefighter.

The unexpected removal of Tim from the roster has left me in a bit of a situation. First of all, over the summer, I bought tickets to a Patriots/Bengals game in October. Far from the best seats in the house, but I was worried that having Tebow on the roster would make the game sell out even faster. Honestly, his signing was the main reason I wanted to go to the game in the first place. My extreme dislike of Tom Brady has me debating on still attending. I could probably offload the tickets pretty easily, either via the Internet or in person. My best friend loves the Patriots and I have several friends in Who Dey Nation. Also, it's a Sunday afternoon game, so nobody will be in class.

The second issue concerns the number of different loyalties I've had in the last 23 years: gold and red, green and yellow. Green and white put a dent in my bank account last season: keychain, purse, ballcap, and 2 different T-shirts (not to mention the Tebow jersey my mom paid a chunk for as one of my Christmas presents). I'm just grateful at this point that I didn't go ahead and get a Jets sorority letter shirt because those definitely aren't cheap and I wouldn't have been able to wear it much. I'm ready for a monogamous relationship with an NFL because switching all the time A) has me feeling like a bandwagon jumper and I don't especially like that feeling and B) is expensive.

I guess the best thing to do is take a few days to think things over and also feel out whether anyone I know might be in the market for upper-deck tickets on the visitors' side of Paul Brown Stadium. Thoughts, anyone?

Tebow Time in New England: A Football Fan's Reflection

Two days ago, I heard that Tim Tebow has finally found a team after being cut by the Jets in April. I'm really happy for him because I think he's a talented player who's gotten a pretty raw deal in the NFL. His bouncing around kind of reminds me of myself. In college, I had to try out an assortment of clubs and activities before I found where I fit in. And I too have had commitment issues when it comes to NFL teams.

Living in a state that has no professional football team (or pro teams of any kind) has its perks; you aren't a leper if you don't root for the home team (that's reserved for college sports). When I was very young (around 4-5 years old), I had a set of 49ers pajamas. By the time I was in 3rd grade, Brett Favre had come along. That meant a Packers jersey and sweatsuit. I've been a baseball and hockey fan for most of my life and those became my passions after Brett retired from the Packers.

When I was in high school, I discovered my favorite college team: the Florida Gators. I'm not especially religious, but I developed an immediate fondness for their quarterback Tim Tebow. He stands up for his beliefs and seems like a genuinely nice guy (not to mention he's pretty cute). I followed his career closely and adopted the Broncos as my favorite team when he was drafted into the NFL.

When the Broncos decided to replace him with Peyton "career-ending, life-altering neck injury imminent" Manning, I took my loyalties to the New York Jets. My parents grew up about an hour from the Jets' home base of East Rutherford, so I had kind of an attachment to them anyway. Rex Ryan also coached football for a season at my alma mater. However, Mark Sanchez's ineptitude and Rex's stubborn refusal to bench him ground away at my nerves. Passing Tebow over in favor of the even-worse-than-Sanchez third-string QB was an insult to the first sophomore to win a Heisman. I severed ties with them when he was released.

And now Tebow has found his way onto the New England Patriots' roster. As glad as I am that there's a head coach that appreciates what he has to offer, I still have mixed feelings. New England was the last place I expected (or wanted) him to end up. Something about Tom Brady has always rubbed me the wrong way. I think it's either his smug "I'm God's gift to football and women" attitude reinforced by his Victoria's Secret model wife, his bizarre metrosexual fashion choices (Uggs? Really?), or both.

My best friend is from Massachusetts and is a lifelong, diehard Pats fan. His reaction to the Tebow decision was one word: "yuck." We gave each other all kinds of crap over our respective favorite teams last season. He finds it hysterical that I'm now having to trade in my hunter green and white for blue, silver, red, and white.

Regardless of my feelings about Brady, I'm still excited about the upcoming season. Tebow helped turn the underperforming Broncos around and led them to the playoffs in the 2011-2012 season. He probably could've done the same for the Jets if the upper management staff hadn't just been using his name to sell tickets, something they've basically admitted to doing. And don't get me started on Rex Ryan's mismanagement. Imagine what Tebow could do for a team that's already good.

"Payphone (Mark Sanchez Style)"

About a week ago, I ran across this Jets-themed parody of Maroon 5's hit song "Payphone." I think it's grossly unfair to be picking on Tebow. He's barely seen any playing time since the preseason, so quite honestly, he's the least of the team's problems at this point. Mark Sanchez has been an absolute embarrassment, especially since his infamous Thanksgiving Day "butt fumble" against the Patriots.

I was inspired to rework the parody's lyrics. Please be aware that I take absolutely no credit at all for the original version by Maroon 5 or the parody video above.

"I'm just a Jets fan
Watching Mark Sanchez
Hoping that he gets pulled from the game
Where has the ball gone?
He's playing all wrong
I sit on my couch cursing his name

Yeah, I-I know that we all remember
The Jets big controversy
It's getting real hard to figure
Why Sanchez is starting QB
He calls himself the "San-chise"
Why does Ryan still try?
And 'cause of the games that he wasted
Playoff hopes are about to die

Tim is benched on game nights
Mark's under the lights
And I'm paralyzed
Just waiting for him to mess up again
And swear loudly when I am right

I'm just a Jets fan
Watching Mark Sanchez
Hoping that he gets pulled from the game
Where has the ball gone?
He's playing all wrong
I sit on my couch cursing his name

If justice in football did exist
Ryan would be benching #6
Tebow haters are so full of it
One more interception, I'll be sick

It's gotten really depressing
Sanchez keeps blowing games
They give him the ball to run with
But Mark just gives points away
You can't expect me to be fine
Why doesn't Rex seem to care?
15 is glued to the bench now
Why won't they just let poor Timmy play?

Tim is benched on game nights
Mark's under the lights
And I'm paralyzed
Just waiting for him to mess up again
And swear loudly when I am right

I'm just a Jets fan
Watching Mark Sanchez
Hoping that he gets pulled from the game
Where has the ball gone?
He's playing all wrong
I sit on my couch cursing his name

If justice in football did exist
Ryan would be benching #6
Tebow haters are so full of it
One more interception, I'll be sick"

Top 10 Quotes: "Remember the Titans"

This coming Saturday (October 13th) is my college's homecoming, which has put me in a football kind of mood. My favorite football movie is Disney's Remember the Titans, so I'm reposting this entry from my blog's previous incarnations.

1. Blue: (reacting to Alan's country music) Does the term "cruel and unusual punishment" mean anything to you?
   
2. Coach Yoast: There's a fine line between tough and crazy and you're flirtin' with it.
   
3. Julius: Attitude reflects leadership.
   
4. Louie: I'm roomin' with Blue, sir, and I noticed that he wears those leopard-spotted underwears. Bikini-style, sir!
   
5. Coach Boone: You will wear a jacket, shirt, and tie. If you don't have one, buy one. If you can't afford one, then borrow one from your old man. If you don't have an old man, find a drunk and trade him for his.
   
6. Coach Yoast: This is a time for reflection and for prayer...
   Gerry: Coach. I'm hurt. I ain't dead.
   
7. Sheryl: I hate playin' with dolls.
   Nicky: I'm not playing. I'm accessorizing.
   
8. Blue: Coach, we need a water break. We been out here all day.
   Coach Boone: Oh, you need a water break? Water is for cowards. Water makes you weak. Water is for washin' blood off that uniform and you don't get no blood on my uniform. Boy, you must be outside yo' mind!
   
9. Coach Yoast: We want them to remember forever the night they played the Titans.
   
10. Coach Boone: We're gonna take a little run through the woods. If you get lost along the way, don't bother comin' back to camp. Just hitchhike your hindparts on home.

My First NFL Game: Jets vs. Bengals

This past Friday, I went with my parents to watch the New York Jets take on the Cincinnati Bengals in a preseason game. I was most excited about seeing the Jets #15--Tim Tebow. I've followed his football career since he played for U of F. Just like Tebow, I was homeschooled for the majority of my childhood. I'm not particularly religious, but I admire the way he stands behind his Christian beliefs. It's hard to find a good sports role model for kids these days, but Tim's one of them. He doesn't drink, commit crimes, or have tantrums when he loses.

As predicted, Paul Brown Stadium was an absolute sea of orange when we arrived. However, I wasn't the only one with Tebowmania. I'd say about 75%-80% of the female Jets fans I saw were wearing a Tebow shirt or carrying a sign related to #15. We were early enough to watch the team warm up. I stood by the rail and watched the heartwarming scene of Tim making a seriously ill child's day.

I'm trying to focus on the positive, but I think the Bengals fans have to be some of the most obnoxious I've ever encountered. And that's saying a lot considering I used to be friends with a diehard Yankees fan. Thankfully I didn't have to listen to the "Bengal Growl" or the equally terrible "Who Dey" chant very much. The attitude of most of the Bengals fans is especially confusing to me because the team hasn't won a Superbowl since before I was born and they're consistently one of the worst-performing teams in the entire NFL. Even their cheerleading squad has a D-grade name: the Ben-Gals. Why not the Tigresses?

I ended up having no voice on Saturday because I spent the majority of the game cheering. I'm not terribly knowledgeable about the game of football, so I can't really comment on Rex Ryan's strategy. I think people really need to stop making jokes about Tebow's passing because the Jets third-string quarterback is infinitely worse. The Jets didn't win, but at least it's only preseason. I have faith that they can bounce back in the first "real" game. J! E! T! S! JETS JETS JETS!